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"I’m Always Preparing to Die”

 "I’m Always Preparing to Die” 


I’m not gonna beg you for a life you didn’t give; 

so if you’re gonna kill me, I don’t have all day or just let me live.

If they should ask you how do I sleep at nights tell them it’s with keeping my demons all at bay;

until I wake then, I do it all over agin the same fucking way.

I have become a squatter in my own home because this is what renters do. 

Why didn’t you come back to my place actually, I don’t blame you. 


I’m drinking pink Chardonnay like these modern rich bitches.

I’m saving money where I can opening the windows, hand washing clothes and hand washing dishes.

You didn’t even send me a text of your pussy anymore nor a sexy call on telegram.

I don’t very much like it that you know me for who I am. 

I tend to watch murder mysteries allot just to see more of who I am.

Wanting someone to suck Him off as soon as He lands; 

I don’t believe you would understand, unless you are a Christian.

 

This one time I thought you were gonna kill yourself for real;

I want you to know how much I love you, not like I love myself and time will heal. 

We were kids ain’t nobody could help. 

There was mischief in our eyes and it was fun to fuck the help.

There was some truth to our lies, 

there was hope for both our lives, 

Every-time you saw me there was heaven in your eyes. 

Working over time to get back to you, you can see the weight on my eyes. 


A fucking rude awakening; don’t worry I won’t just watch you cry, 

I’ll drink your tears, relish in your fears, park my foot on your thorax until you eventually die. 

Keep bragging on your resources if its not the British colonizing your ass then the Chinese will rape you off. 

All I ever was, was honest so why did you cut me off?

Tell me why must I ‘climb’ to your level? Soon I won’t be available, probably when you needed me most. 

By then the world shall consume you as you grin your teeth pop out a breast and boast, 

I should chop off your breast and roast!

I should just disappear from now a ghost.

I should let him breathe, let him take charge for once my host! 

But every time I try to fly away from you I end up being lost… 

Leaving my soul full of regret, I’m ashamed to share the cost. 


Dead End. 



From: ryzoncity 

By: imuzi ironizah Thompson 

Written: June 1, 2021



“There’s always more… Eccentric Artistry.” —imuzi ryzoncity Thompson © 2021

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